Children Responsibilities

As parents, our children are our pride and joy.  We want to protect them and always make sure they have what we never had.  Sometimes, through our mini battles with our children, we let go and let them take charge for a little while.  We open our hearts to the pouty faces, the “I’m sorry Mom”, “PLEASE”, etc…, and we don’t allow our children to take responsibility for their actions.  It’s okay to let go of some things and pick and choose our battles, but when it comes to taking responsibility for messing up their room, putting on their clothes, showering, and most of all, their behavior, we have to make sure that we teach them the right demeanor.
 

Remember, children are very wise. We might say to ourselves, “oh, he/she doesn’t know what they are doing,” but truly they are taking us for a joy ride.  I know because it’s happened to my husband and me.  We have learned throughout the 4 years of parenting that our daughter picks and chooses who she goes to when she wants one thing or the other, and she knows who she can manipulate to get her way.  We’ve had to learn to stick together as parents and be consistent. It’s been tough, but we are finally there. 

 

Showing our children to be responsible is a way to let them know they can do it themselves and it also gives them the opportunity to learn from the situation, be independent and take a sense of pride in their work.  At a young age, try teaching your child the clean-up song, and mimic picking things up so they get the concept.  Once they get older, have them help you clean up until they are old enough to clean up for themselves.  You can play games by having them count and pick up 5 things in a room and put them into the toy chest. If you have more than one child this will go a long way, and when you least expect it, everything will be cleaned up.  Add to those 5 things each day. One day, you will see the children have cleaned up all by themselves and mommy will be a happy mommy. 

I’ve had a hard time getting my child to dress herself in the morning.  See, I tend to take control of situations because I want things done fast and at times my way.  My daughter is very headstrong and at times we have our little battles in the mornings.  I have learned that I have to let go of some things and let her become her little independent being especially when it comes to dressing herself.  I have taught her that she needs to wiggle her pants so they get through her legs, how to fix her socks, button and zip her shirts on. However, she does it in her own time.  My own sense of control kicks in and I want to do it for her, but I am not allowing her to take responsibility for that action if I take over.  In order to work with my daughter’s headstrongness, I allow her to select from 2 outfits.  Then I give her the opportunity to get dressed.  If she is unwilling to do what is asked, I begin counting up to 3. If she is still being disobedient, I sit her in time out to give her time to recompose, think and make a better decision when she is ready to move on.   

Allow your children to have the opportunity to become a bit independent and responsible for their actions.  Praise them and work together on getting things done so that everyone is happy.